|
Safe Passagesupport for those struggling with homosexuality
|
1. The Way of the Cross
What is repentance? Not the worm-like, flagellistic self-perception that we may have taken on as an expression of our unresolved shame or been taught unfortunately in our church settings. Repentance is a turning--a recognition of the sin and brokenness that we are faced with or are acting out, and an orientation (a heart-level resolve) to go a different way--to hold on to the truth He reveals and the life He offers for ourselves in who we are and in our relationships.
Essential to this is the ministry of the Cross--Christ's death and resurrection (wherein He enters into our sufferings and bears the sins committed by and against us, and cleanses us from its effects and leads us into His greater life). In facing the reality of where we have become affected by or bound to sin, we experience a loss of the familiar perceptions or responses we've relied on (e.g. denial of the extent of brokenness by not naming what's really going on in us, or ways of splitting off from anxious, angry or sad feelings through things which anesthetize--divert and/or pleasure). There is therefore a suffering (walking through the pain), death (forsaking of false ways of coping), cleansing (lifting of the weight of specific sin and brokenness), and resurrection (entrance into new, healthier, purer, truer ways of being and responding). Ties in closely with confession, forgiveness, and healing.
2. What it looks like: the Buttoning analogy--a striking picture of repentance and the process surrounding it! (speaking from much personal experience)
- Unease. Something doesn't add up; initially aware of the fact things aren't working
- Searching. On "microscopic" level, everything seems fine (each button is properly in a slot and even in the right sequence; the only problem is in the starting point to which everything else refers)
- Recognition (coming "back to one's self") -- suddenly, the larger picture becomes clear-- I'm "out of phase"
- Grieving stages: frustration, denial, bargaining, acceptance...there's anger at self, indignant disbelief, trying to find an easy way out, and finally acceptance that there is nothing redeemable about this configuration as it stands--it will have to be totally dismantled and redone--groan. So this is where the real grieving and despair sets in, but with peaceful acceptance and support it eventually transitions into...
- Deeper resolve and clarity (courage and commitment to walk through the process, and objectivity in seeing what it entails), and the difficult work of healing begins. Victor Hugo [1] Les Miserables quote (see the teaching on Mercy).
3. Regarding what?
Inward matters of the heart; ways of coping or protecting that have become isolating, addictive and/or disfiguring; dysfunctional ways of addressing needs--lesser attachments that preempt attachment to Love Himself
Recognition of how we've substituted false remedies for our true life source; honestly naming sin and brokenness (Ps 32, Ezek 16); heart-level response to this reality is itself an expression of repentance, even if we feel powerless to live a different way. He beckons us to forsake what is killing us!
Specifically, the process entails a relinquishment of unhealthy investment; yielding of control and inner vows, grieving the loss of lesser ways of finding comfort and providing protection. Forgiveness and healing prayer can address:
Mediating His entrance into the pain (having entered into the journey, we see Him indwell our past, present and future--the facts remain what they are, but we are no longer alone in pain or defined by our history)
Relevant scriptures and books
4. What is sin?
In essence, sin is that which is not rooted in trusting communion with the Lord Whose desire is to really know us relationally (Ro 14.23--whatsoever is not of faith is sin, Mt 7.23, works done outside of union with Him are counted as iniquity). He beckons us to life--unashamed wholehearted participation and restful dependence upon Him through the work of the Cross. The incredible sadness of hating our vulnurability to sinning (and being sinned against) more than we abhor the defilement itself--i.e. hating our needs rather than the falseness of how we've tried to meet them. He frees us from this horrid double-bind.
5. Results and outworkings of the process
Our hearts are ignited by the hope that there is more life--our deep hunger for resolve and union with what is real, life-giving and true. Staying in our present, half-life state is unbearable--with trust in Him, we can dare to taste of the unknown--the unfamiliar things to which He is beckoning usHe enables us to relinquish control of our salavation--Phil. 2:12 --trusting Him to walk us through it--Ps. 16:11. We prayerfully collaborate with the work of the Holy Spirit; He respects our boundaries and works in time; it is safe to admit our fears; we can bear to hear the truth from Him because it is immersed in love/ grace; He calls to the true soul--calls us to emerge--without traumatizing or violating usLike awakening from a bad dream, our frame of reference enlarges beyond the constraints of past sinful patterns or disappointments--moves away from detachment, helplessness, cynicism, addictiveness, despair, anxious, etc.--our whole world-view begins to shift through encounters with His love (not through mere cognition)--attachment to His life at the most basic levels.
Note [1]. The author of the original, Les Miserables novel was written by Victor Hugo. Alain Boublil and Claude-Michel Schönberg created the play, Schönberg wrote the music, and Herbert Kretzmer wrote the musical lyrics.
[Safe Passage homepage] [Other teachings and articles]
